love through time

"I don't like it."

that was what I said after reading the story "Long Walk to Forever", not that I didn't like the story or something, it just made me feel bitter, made this forgotten (forced!) feeling rise up again like it was never even lost.

stories like this one never fail to sting me and never fail to open up that wound in my heart, how first love broke your heart, how your first love never turned out to be the one walking you down that aisle. Life is like that, when we fall for the first time we think that this is the last, and so when it ends, we feel like ending our lives too. Catherine and Newt was a better example, they taught us that true love prevails even when there is confusion. You always have to risk in order to succeed, you have to try in order to be content, cause if you don't, how will you know? There are no second chances in life, and you have to grab every opportunity while there is.

Love left unsaid is like fire burning, it may subside and it may extinguish, but once it gets enough space and air, it burns through out.... I just didn't like this kind of ending, why does it always have to be in the end when they realized that they love each other, love that's enough to forget another. It was unfair for Henry, but if I were in Catherine's case, I would do the same. I will marry the guy I know I will be happy with.

three letters from Teddy

I mentioned in my previous blog entry that sometimes the bestest of relationships begin on the wrong foot.. and this was exactly how the author and Teddy began their relationship on the wrong foot. With the other judging at once the other. The first paragraphs tell us that we shouldn't be judgmental especially that we are teachers. Yes, I am a teacher, proud to be, happy to be.. I remember what my professor told me during my first years of taking my course that inside the classroom there will always be those students who will annoy you, these students whom you silently wish will be absent for that day or maybe for the whole year. Yes it is bad, but hey this is reality. No matter how we try to be fair and equal to all of our students their will always be that evil force we call bias.

My personal principle as a teacher to be, is that I should always face the students as individuals inside a room not as a group or as a class inside a room. Why did I say this? I believe that we are unique individuals we have our own strengths, weaknesses, needs and capabilities As teachers we were trained to be accepting of this reality, we were trained to always put the child at the center and always value their needs. We have to be considerate of every aspect but of course not to the extent that we tolerate their wrong doings. The story I just rode made me more sure of this thinking that I have, that I am right, that one day this scenario will also happen to me... but I have to be better, because I am more considerate.

They say that we always remember those who are intelligent but inside the classroom I believe that we should exert more effort to those who are having a hard time cope and that we should go deeper to why this child is asking in a negative way. Teachers have to change this disposition by reaching out to the child. I have always said to myself that being an early childhood educator isn't such a hard job and is easily forgotten, but this story proved me wrong. I can make a huge impact on a child... and it is up to me if I make a hole or create stairs to a positive learning disposition. I always hope for the latter.

Never underestimate your power to teach minds, touch hearts, and change lives. As a teacher you can do all of these if you just do it right and do your job with passion and love. You can be a mother, a sister, a friend to your students... of course with limitation.. and be surprised of that one day when you receive a letter or maybe an actual encounter with your old students and tell you how you changed their lives forever.

lucky

of the many roads I took in life,
and many turns that turned out to be wrong.
I must be damn lucky to have found you here.

people i miss the most

it's been a year, well almost, since I last saw these girls. They were my best friends back in high school, and believe me they are still my best friends today. I just want to say that I miss them so much; Many times during my struggling days of being caught up in confusion on whether to be the person that society wants me to be or be that person that I think I should be they were there. They managed to accept me for who I am, a bit arrogant and strong yet soft on the inside. I have nothing but so much love and respect for these girls. During those days, we would sit outside our classroom and sing our hearts out, or talk about boys and why we couldn't have them. We were there for each other... all the time. Some of us got on the wrong foot with each other, but we managed to create a chemistry. Different but one. I guess that's how real friendship begins.. on the wrong foot.

I remember that day, when we were about to graduate from high school and they were the first people I looked for when we sang that "Through the Years" song, I just hugged them and cried with them. I knew right then and there that we were for real. Not just some click we create so that we wont feel alone and left out.. well, this one had a purpose. whatever it is, I don't know how to explain it. SORRY. But the point is, our friendship is the best thing that happened to me.

Now that we are in college and again about to graduate, I look back with so much contentment. I wasn't the most popular girl in school, nor did I have the most number of friends. My teachers do not even remember my name and my batch mates would be left with puzzled look if you ask them about me.. but these people... they made me feel like I was an important part of high school. We may not be able to be with each other all the time, or talk to each other all the time.. But one thing I know still remains, it's that bond that high school forged, something unforgettable.. legendary.

They made me the person that I am today. And for that noble job, I would like to thank them from the bottom of my heart. Anna, Ange, Pat and Eds thank you so much for always being there for me.. for being the best friends and sisters that I never had. Love you guys and I miss you.. Hope to see you soon. :)

colors of life

im too lazy to put a write up here, but anyway this photo was taken using my Diana cam. no photoshop thingy here, just pure lucky shots. :))

set sail

let the child dream
lend the child your ear
for what is tomorrow if we do not trust
this generation that we made.
they are tomorrow.
they are now.
let their future be brighter than the past.
be that light.
set sail, far far away.
to the foreign sea
or to the familiar territory.

out there

somewhere out there, have you tried looking?
somewhere out there, have you thought about it?
out there I might find answers to my feelings.
out there I might find hope for what I am dreaming.
no matter how dark my path is.
no matter how hopeless it can get.
out there is where I will be.
out there is where my home will be.

note: photo was taken using Diana F, Fuji 120 Film